Step Out of the Shadow

Some people, no matter how wonderful, interesting and talented they are, often remain in shadow. Let’s take a random company – people are talking, having fun, somebody tell jokes and somebody share his travel experience, the normal situation of human communication. But have a more attentive look at the corner of the room. See anything? Look deeper in the shadow and there you will probably see an obscure figure – here stands Mr. Shy. If it is you who are standing in the corner and pretends to be nothing, you have a serious communicative problem and should deal with it in order not to stay in this corner for the rest of your life.

We will not define the reasons of your shyness as it is complicated psychological issue. It may be the result of your upbringing or of some psychological trauma, or the consequence of too low self-esteem. The fact is, your shyness is here, always with you, and you have to get rid of it somehow. First, you need to perform a serious training of your mind. Start every morning with telling yourself how great you are, create the list of your achievements – it will show you that you can do something significant. While being in the company, do not think that you are the center of common attention and behave normally. However, all these theoretical recommendations are nothing without practice of your communicative skills with strangers.

For example, start asking the bypasses how much time is it now. Only the first step will be difficult – after it you will see that people are not laughing or pointing at you.

Then proceed with a more complicated task – take some items, like chocolate eggs and offer them to bypasses in exchange of some item of their own – even a match will do. You will see that it is much fun and, besides, you will have a funny collection of random objects.

Another exercise is working with your appearance. Put on some strange garments, like an old fedora hat, tie decorated with yellow ducks and so on. Walk in this stuff along the central streets, catch the surprised glances of people and smile back.

Do these exercises every day as your communicative skills, like your muscles, need constant practice to be in good form. Talk to strangers, do not be afraid to evoke negative reaction, because positive responses will in any case prevail.

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